"I don't believe in voodoo" T-shirt

Logic is a very fine thing, provided it does not crumble into dust when the clock strikes seventeen. You are a rational being. You eat toast. You pay taxes. You do not believe in the invisible machinations of the universe. Excellent. This shirt is for you. But let us consider the delicious irony, yes? By wearing a shirt that explicitly denies the power of Voodoo, you are acknowledging its potential existence. It is a linguistic trap! A sartorial non-sequitur! Historically speaking, the Vodun of the Fon people in Benin—ancestors of the Haitian practice—was never about sticking pins in dolls (a European invention, incidentally, derived from the poppet). It was about spirits, or Iwa, managing the traffic of the cosmos. But you do not care. You are a modern skeptic. You simply wish to cover your torso to prevent social awkwardness and thermal loss. Wear this garment to ward off the irrational. Or, perhaps, wear it as a talisman. For if you must loudly proclaim you do not believe in the invisible, one must wonder: who are you trying to convince? The spirits? Or the nervous chicken in your soul? Buy this shirt. It is 100% cotton (mostly). It exists. Therefore, you should wear it. If you do not buy it, the rhinoceroses might win. Key Features: Material: Existence-affirming fabric (likely cotton blend). Design: Text that screams into the void so you don't have to. Function: protects the wearer from cold and, theoretically, hexes (results may vary based on your level of existential dread). Perfect for: Anthropologists, contrarians, people who are afraid of dolls, and Tuesdays.